Trying not to lose faith...

I think that whatever powers that float around the universe have decided that today is the day for me to think about women's issues. Well, gender issues. Because I was reading for my International Conflict Mediation course (which is really interesting but has virtually nothing to do with what I study so I am like a freshman, treading through unknown waters and vocabulary with only the most rudimentary frame of reference...) and our topic for this week is the influence of personal perspective on negotiation processes (and more specifically, the role that gender plays in mediation and resolution in both formal and informal settings). While the articles are interesting, they really make me think about the state of the world today. As much as I bitch about my country, it could be so much worse. Though I am not so naive to think that the fight for equality is over or even really begun, at least I grew up in an environment where I was nurtured and prized, I was never less than my brother or any other male within my narrow sphere of experience. I had ground from which to fight and my battles have been numerous, but at least they were always coming from a base of "equality" (in my case, just sometimes certain people thought some were deserved to be more equal), and not from the basis that I had no right to even be speak in public.

And then, after reading these articles for class, I started reading this book that my brother had and had left here for me to read. Apparently a well-sold "fratire" by an insufferable man, I spent the day reading it not because I liked it, but because I never stop reading books before I am finished. As I descended into a state of utter disgust at the thought that someone out there, or worse, many people out there, found this pedestrian drivel funny. Nay, hilarious. Surely not, how could a bunch of stories about degrading women, drinking in excess and generally being an accepted asshole cause this revolting man to consider himself a "writer" or even a "comedian"? Convinced that I must have been wrong, that the only explanation could have been that everyone else who had read it had the same sick fascination with trainwrecks and inability to just not finish, I went to facebook. I looked it up on iRead. And was dumbfounded at the hordes of people - many affiliated with a university! - who wrote loving reviews of the vile book. Most ran along the lines of, "I know this guy is an asshole and no one should ever do the things that he writes about doing in his book, but it was so funny!" I guess I just don't understand how calling everyone woman you meet in a bar a whore is funny. Insulting people with admittedly no provocation.

And it wasn't even well written! Granted, I am somewhat of a snob when it comes to books (with the exception of my love for Harry Potter...) and I tend to not like popular literature. I still read it because I like knowing what people are talking about when they bring up certain books, but they are not the ones the I read over and over again, that I treasure and write in and become emotionally involved in. Sometimes I just lose faith in people as a whole when I read books that are "popular", and feel an almost smug sense of satisfaction that at least I am better than those people because I don't pretend that the crap that I read sometimes is fine literature that is going to be remembered by the ages.

I dunno. I guess I am just disgusted in people. And a little stupider for not letting myself stop reading after reading the first chapter. And in some ways, profoundly lucky because I have been in a loving relationship with a wonderful man for a good while now and I guess romantic stability spared me from having to ever directly deal with assholes like the author of this book. So, thanks, Ben, for protecting me from men like that. And apparently there are many, given the number of positive reviews of this book (90% of them are written by men)

Like I said, I dunno. *sigh*

-B